In a few days time, it will be one year that I started
driving on Lagos roads and trying to survive the maniacs that ply the same
route with me. It’s funny, this time last year I was a juvie on the road and
people would practically almost run me off the road with overtaking or blasting
their stupid car horns when you least expect it. In one year of driving, I’ve
seen so many crazy people on the road, most especially those danfo drivers.
They would curse at you, overtake you, stay right in the middle of the road to
load the bus, scratch your car, cause confusion and run with high speed putting
the lives of many passengers in danger. I often wish Lagos State would scratch
Danfo off Lagos roads but a humble side of me reminds me frankly that I used to
be one of those people who would use elbows to fight to get into the same
danfo. So I would just swallow spit and swear at them when they overtake me, it
kinda makes me feel better. I mean just some few weeks back, I almost fell into
Lagos lagoon when one danfo made me swerve suddenly as it tried to squeeze
itself in the small space in front of my car!
As for personal car drivers, I’ve seen my share of road rage
which I thought only existed in the U.S.A. This week, in front of Silverbird
Galleria, I saw a guy in a jeep almost crash into a guy in a white car and they
started to swear at each other, blocking each other from passing ahead and
causing an uproar up until Bar Beach. I started to accelerate with them trying
to see what would eventually happen and didn’t realize I was doing almost a
speed of 75 out of curiosity. I try not join people in road rage o, I once saw
a movie where a woman cut a guy off on the road because she was running off
somewhere, the guy tried to run her down violently and this was midnight. When
he didn’t succeed, he ended up stalking her, threatening her family, trying to
kill her and even put a car bomb in the lady’s mum’s car! So I gentle well
well.
One thing that annoys me is the way young guys drive, they
believe swagger is speed or coming out of a corner without checking if there’s
an oncoming vehicle. Most men in the 21-40 age bracket especially those who
drive Toyota Camry are the worst. It’s like a spirit. Once I notice a guy
driving recklessly and he passes by my car, the car is always a Camry. Even the
day I was with a friend in his Camry, he was driving like he was in a rush to
reach Hell Fire. I just don’t get it. Some of these crazy Camry drivers have
humongous egos and would never let a woman drive past them in traffic as if it’s
a competition of life. When they eventually bypass you, you would then catch a
glimpse of satisfied grins on their faces as if they are unbalanced.
I was listening to the radio one day when the presenter
started complaining about his plight on the way to work that day. He said a guy
kept on overtaking people as if he was the only one who was late to work that
morning and almost killed people with his car, guess what car the guy was
driving? Oh yeah, a Toyota Camry. Smh. Whenever I see any car that has been
bashed trying to run me over, I just move aside for them because I know the
bashes on their vehicles is trying to tell me something, “Don’t mess with a mad
man”. If the car is a Camry with bashes on it, I practically slow down to a
speed of 20km or gently switch off my engine on the road for his royal madness
to pass, I’m that respectful, lol.
So for those of you guys who drive Camrys, abeg take am
easy, there’s a Camry spirit that makes those with testosterone misbehave on
the road. Nobody should die all mangled up on the road, drive safely, you will
surely get where you are going and not where you do not expect to find yourself.
XOXO :):)
