I AM NO LONGER NIGERIAN

Hello everyone,

Thank you so much for reading the last post which gave more insight on the Big Brother 2020 contestants. I see you all and thanks for your support.

 Can we talk about the situation of our beloved country Nigeria for a short minute? This week has been replete with news of the decay in our country politically, economically and in all other aspects. 

Things are not looking up and for once, all my friends in Canada are taunting me that I should have joined them when I had the chance. I used to tell them I love it here in Nigeria but all of a sudden, I do not have that confidence anymore, it is lost.

 

THE NIGERIAN FLAG Formerly of greatness

I have never been an advocate of brain drain or permanent migration to another country. This may be borne out of my stance of deep loyalty to Nigeria or maybe the underlying fear of the possibility of being treated like a second class citizen in a white man's land. I have had  eye-opening experiences with some foreign people here in Nigeria and their perception of a black person does not sit right with me so I feel like I am more grounded at home here in Nigeria than anywhere else. 

 Even as much as I love visiting Dubai, that's all I want to do, go visit and come back home. Nigeria is always home but these days, not so much. Even Dubai is no longer a fan of the high-spending Nigerians, thanks to the favourite delinquent friend of the politicians, hushpuppy.

What prompted today's topic was the news that FIRS (Federal Inland Revenue Service) has ordered all property owners and their agents to charge a whooping 6% stamp duty on all tenancy and lease agreements with tenants. Why? As if the agency commission and other annoying additions on rents are not enough! So now, to rent an apartment will be such a herculean task for everyone even without an increase in income level or any economic reprieve. Why should people pay additional levies when the government cannot even account for the current taxes we are paying? All they do is to siphon funds and divert them for personal aggrandizement at the expense of the Nigerian population.

You know who bears the brunt for all these evil policies? The masses and let me tell you something, you and I are now masses. If you notice that your expenses have risen because prices of food commodities have gone up, you are masses my dear. You are masses baje baje. If you notice that you now fear for your dwindling savings and wonder how you are going to survive without a steady alternative source of income, you mass bro. 

We see this everyday and it's Norm (Akinfadeyi foundation)

 This week as well, Sanwo-Olu, the governor of Lagos State approved a hike in bus fares. Please does this price hike affect Sanwo-Olu's families? No, it only affects the masses which includes you and myself. Yes, I drive a car but these things come back to bite us in our innocent asses. Let me break it down because we cannot even eat ordinary plantain the way we used to anymore.

The market woman who sells food items in Lagos has to take several buses to Ketu or Mile 12 to purchase items in bulk and sell at a price that will enable her earn reasonable profit. If she takes multiple expensive buses to Ketu, she will definitely spread that cost on her items and you have to pay what she puts as selling price to shop for the home except you are ready to start planting your own food produce. Good luck with that. Does your home even have the space? We are all living in cupboards in this Lagos.

Is it even fair to hike prices and introduce stamp duties in a “corona economy” when the population is 45% unemployed? Businesses are not running at full capacity and the entire nation is cowering under the pressure of a pandemic. Why are those in government not affected by this? They have amassed money they did not work for so they can obviously afford any exorbitantly-priced items. Have you heard the amount of money that is unaccounted for every single day amongst these politicians? They steal in dollars, they steal in properties, they steal in the billions, they embezzle the citizen’s entitlements and these are all daylight robberies because they steal with impunity with no one to bring them to account. We all saw the one that fainted during a probe this week and a slew of all these corrupt people in power have gone the route of feigning injury or sudden sicknesses to get away from scrutiny until we all forget about them.

 

NDDC'S MD faints during a probe for fraud. "Feints"

 Our problems as Nigerians include forgetfulness, corruption and cowardice amongst a host of other developmental flaws that will not help us grow if we do not re-consider our ways. Someone once said that for Nigeria to be great again, a revolution has to happen and in revolutions, thousands if not millions will die. No single Nigerian is ready to die for Nigeria, myself included. I do not want to die for my country because they may share money during the fight and everyone will go back to status quo.

What’s going to happen with this new levy of 6% stamp duty on property acquisitions is that it will also be squandered by either the government, the housing agents or even landlords because let’s face it, the average Nigerian is corrupt.

So back to my title, at this point, I have given up on Nigeria. I never thought I would ever say this but looking at how the country was when I was a child compared to now, the rot is too deep. Let’s not even talk about the religious sect of the country, another arm of the country oppressing the masses but let’s not get heretical. 

It is time to either fight or take flight. I am not a fighter, I am a lover, most especially a lover of life and enjoyment. So just like the coward that I am as a true Nigerian before before, I am also running away from Nigeria at the slightest chance I get as soon as the international airways open unless something gives even if it is a niche. Electricity, education, youth empowerment, grassroot growth, industrial development and other structures that serve as the bulwark foundation of an economy are non-existent in Nigeria. 

No bleach can wash it off. (Igbo focus)

 It may take me years again, years of repetitive hardwork, after the 18 years of hardwork I have given the Nigerian nation but I am done with this green passport, its green does not represent wealth at all, its green represent a moldy decay. Let’s not even talk about the white colour of the flag, it is stained with the scarlet blood of several victims of the law. Nigeria has failed us. Done!

BIG BROTHER NAIJA 2020 (CONTESTANTS AND THEIR HANDLES!)

It’s that time of the year again, it’s voyeurism time! Big brother Naija 2020 has set off and introduced 20 contestants to us on 19^th of July 2020. The time we will all watch other people live their lives on national television while we sit and judge their characters or determine the ultimate results.

It was so much fun ogling all those contestants on screen and most of them have interesting personalities so far. 

Let’s get to business and meet each one of them to explore what exactly makes them watch-worthy……….. for now. You know opinions change as the weeks fly by, it’s just week 1 of the several weeks the contestants will spend in the house, leggo!

In the order of appearance:

Insta: @officialozo_

OZOEMENA : When this guy popped up on the screen, you cannot help but marvel at how gorgeous he is especially because of his complexion which seems to be a highlight of the male contestants in their introduction videos. He is well spoken and comes from a family of high-achievers as he mentioned that he has 3 sisters, two of whom are medical doctors while one is a lawyer. Ozo is an entrepreneur, a catch right? He is already a fan favourite.

@veeiye

VICTORIA VEE is our Briton in the house this year and her over-friendliness was very obvious as she ensured she welcomed almost all the other housemates as they arrived. She is very opinionated and has been in Nigeria for one year to get good opportunities. She says she is a musician, maybe she has not heard about the plights of Nigerian female musicians but hey, she is on one of the popular platforms to show us her songbird prowess.

@princenelsonenwerem

 NELSON PRINCE is another entrepreneur (everyone is running from salary) who is into fitness and evidently dons a sexy physique. He is a bit stand-offish at first and apparently his dad is a king so hence his name. The most important information about Prince is that he was crowned Mr Nigeria in 2018. One of the other housemates asked “So what are you doing here?” We have wondered the same thing, we will all find out with time because this guy already had a small tiff with a lady in-house over ownership of bed.  This aint ya kingdom, Prince.

@liloaderogba

 LILO: This babe is beautiful and she is quick to emphasize that she is a Yoruba girl from Osun state. A Dietician (who drank alcohol, became tipsy and overly excited on the first day in-house) who says she does not like people being all up in her business. Wait, does she know what Big Brother Naija is all about? She is one of the pretty girls in the house and is already about to be involved in entanglement with the fine boys in the building. Lilo seems wild and said something about pussy and dick the first night, but not many Nigerians heard this clearly.

@trikytee

TIMMY TRIKYTEE burst on to our screen with so much energy and immediately portrayed himself as the happy-go-lucky guy, he even gave us some nice dance steps. TrikyTee is 35 years old which is kind of old in big brother generation but we are loving his vibes which is positive so far. He says his mouth may put him in trouble in the house but he is doing fine now as he said a big hello to his fellow contestants when he stepped into the house. He is into film and music.

@oluwaluciana

 LUCY is the bottle blonde in the house and came in wearing spandex. She is also an entrepreneur, sighs. Lucy comes across as a guy’s girl because she is quite sociable and laughs a lot. She is 30 years old, miles older than most of the girls in the house but her juices are still over-flowing as we all saw her reaction when the tall Eric removed his shirt. Lucy strikes us as a freaky freaky because she even started giggling and jumping giddily when Praise (an exotic dancer) did a little whine with his waist, we cannot wait for things to start heating up.

@kiddwaya

KIDDWAYA - Wait for it, he is the son of a Billionnaire, according to reports o. This one reminds us of Iyanya, thick and all built up with sinewy muscles. He is kinda cool too but lost some points when he said he is known for being confident and arrogant. Not sure these are qualities that are endearing but oh well, it could be a defense mechanism. Guys like this are super softies, you just need to know where to tickle. Kiddwaya is self-employed (Decoration for the term entrepreneur)

E be like say nobody left a salaried job for Big Brother this year o, corona don show us waya! Get it?

@thedorathybachor

DORATHY……OMG!!! This 24 years old lady got everyone talking, some screaming while some were just left with their mouths open with plenty drooling. Why? Two words. Mammary glands! Dorathy has gigantic boobs and she came well-packaged in a black frilly gown that pushed up her boobs up to her forehead. The boobs are quite beautiful to look at, no lies here, even women are mesmerized by the size. Twitter was abuzz with Dorathy’s chest with many saying she does not need to worry, she is already a winner with her future (boobs in front). Dorathy is also an entrepreneur, whew!

 @itz_praise

PRAISE. This Flavour look-alike guy is a good dancer and many have said he is the “Tuoyo” of this season which in layman terms mean he is the exotic dancer or stripper of this season. He is already showing us his waist- whining skills. This 28 years old guy came into the house with a well-groomed head of dreads and earrings, dangling earrings please, while he almost appeared effeminate, Praise quickly dispelled our fears by announcing that he was once in a relationship with two women who were both well-aware of the fact. Word is Praise is a father but he made no mention of him being one. 

@wathonianyansi

 WATHONI FLORENCE: Part Kenyan, Part Nigerian, Wathoni seems very laidback so far and she mentioned that she is a mom. She is into the fashion, music and loves taking pictures. She also comes across as very playful and has dimples when she smiles. She would need to do more to make people talk about her as Big Brother is no place for any 29 year old wallflower.

@officialtochi_oke

 TOCHI: Tochi is a single guy and one of those ones we are still waiting to get a feel on. His beard is giving some people anxiety attacks as it almost covers his entire face, if he sells beard oil, he will sell out, like he is a perfect model for it. He is into real estate and is a 28 years old who wants to be himself in the house. Yeah right. Moving on. 

@official_ka3na

KATRINA – KA3NA – KATE JONES: Multiple personality? Introducing tattoos and a big gold chain with her name on it. All about promoting her brand, obviously, no, she actually said it, a good strategy. Katrina says she hates poverty and wants to be famous. While speaking to Ebuka during her introduction, she was actually speaking like she was giving her winning speech. So far, we have not seen any winning anything, she even forgot to wear her mic at a point in the house. How will we vote for you when we cant hear you?

@akhigbeeric

  ERIC: Eric is tall, like 6 foot 5 and into fitness too. Guy’s body is amazing, he took off his shirt and almost made Lucy forget her home training. So far, Eric is a cool guy and a looker. He just seems like a guy most girls will like. My advice, stay shirtless Eric, burn your shirts in the backyard of the house, burn all your shirts to ashes, then blow the ashes away. Give us a respite in this corona era, give Nigerians something good to look at. Thank you in advance.

@ericanlewedim

NGOZI ERICA: 26 years old Erica gave us low-budget Mercy Eke vibes (last BBNaija winner) at first but guess what, we changed our minds like few minutes later. She is an actress from Met Film London who wants to be a well-known  celebrity and says with impunity that she is the star of the show. Pomposity incorporated. She walked to the stage like she was competing in a beauty pageant but she is truly a beauty as we would later find out when she removed all the makeup from her face in the house and we could still recognize her . We didn’t mistake her for a “Ninja”. She is one of the beautiful ladies in the house.

@official.brighto

BRIGHT: Wait, why does the note here say “seems boring”? oh yeahhhhh, this is the evangelist guy. He seems quite out of place, maybe he would have fared better if BBNaija was held on a ship as Bright works as a Sailor. This Bright guy was caught on camera staring blankly into nothingness while in the house on the first day. Fish out of water true true.

@kaisha_officialbbn

AISHA KAISHA: Loooooooong sigh. I swear, this person was put in the house as a not so nice distraction. She is 25 years old from Sokoto and we wish she could just go back to Sokoto as one of her “Uncles” is already complaining on Twitter about her not being true to their “Arewa” culture where women are bashful. Please bash the door for her to go out and back to So Ko To. No interesting personality here, not exactly what people want to watch on television and this is just the honest truth. Kaisha should take Bright along with her too. Sighs. Moving on.

No time. We do not have patience to accommodate mis-fits in corona period. Every day counts.

@iamtheonlyneo

 NEO: Not going to write his full name here, no space. He drives Uber and talked about his baggage a lot on-screen. He is quite loud and took over game session in the house with so much aggression that we almost turned the television off. But hey, we love a hustler, we hope Neo brings matrixes of not so forced entertainment very soon.

@tolanibaj

TOLANIBAJ:  Tolani is a 27 years old lady who likes money a lot. She said it, we are quoting. She says she is a Queen and danced very well during her introduction to us. She comes across as very put-together and confident but we caught her making faces at the other contestants in the house. Maybe, that’s just her face though. She was one of those people we didn’t recognize after the makeup had been wiped off under the natural lighting of the big brother house.

@itslaycon

 LAYCON: Of Lay Lay Lay of Lagos! This guyyyyyyyyyy. There were so many birds fluttering and tweeting on Twitter over Laycon, wow! Laycon came on to the screen and we were like, who is the electrician? This 26 years old musician came into our vision wearing a lit-up jacket that looked like he just stole all the lights in the transformers from an area in Ikorodu. People came bearing down on Laycon as several memes emerged about his looks within minutes of his appearance on television. No lies, it was super hilarious. Laycon is Yoruba and looks every bit of the part. People really judged Laycon by his cover so bad. Guess what? This seems to be working in his favour as it got people talking about him and posting his photographs which made him to have quite the free buzz online. Laycon also seems to be more than meets the eyes when he opens his mouth, he speaks polished English and has already delivered a now popular statement “Have Sense”. Somebody should make a shirt with that inscription! Laycon the Underdog.

@nengiofficial

  NENGI: Nengi. Nengi. Nengi. Those producers at Big Brother Naija are such teases of the year, they put the hottest for last to titillate us. Gorgeous, curvy,  attractive 22 years old beauty queen who wants all of us to do the utmost impossible, see beyond her appearance and get to know her. Say what? Nengi, we cannot see beyond that your backside which you were quick to accentuate in an itty bitty bumshort as soon as you got into the house. Nengi with the glow and curves, came with a wave of “kill them all” as she made us forget all the female contestants that came before her. This lady went from a few thousand followers on Instagram to 100k followers and counting within few hours of her showing up on our screens. Everyone wants Nengi to pair with OZo as a couple but this would be Ojoro so we are not praying for this to happen, not that there is any chance of it occurring anyways.

So there it is! 20 contestants of Big Brother Naija 2020. It is going to be awesome!

Bonus pictures of Nengi as a beauty queen

She fine, we know, Let someone else shine. Rhymes.

Thanks Jenny for the bonus pictures.

 Modupe Onanuga Longe